Good question. Well, my name is Scott Suyat, I'm a history major at the University of Hawaii.

1a) History major? Are you serious?

Well, yeah.

1b) Why?

Why not?

1c) Hey, I ask the questions here!

Oh. Well, I don't like science or math or business or any of those other fields where people can get jobs. I like reading about historical events and historical figures as well as writing and forming my own opinions about said historical events and figures. And since an Englsih degree is just that much lower on the importance scale, I became a history major.

1d) Sounds reasonable but what are you planning to do with a history degree?

Go to grad school. Or law school. Or be a reasearcher. Who knows? Next set of questions please.

2) What's with the ScotTopia name. Kind of dorky, don't you think?

Look, with the amount of people on the net these days (I don't dare count the amount of Scotts on the net alone) ScotTopia is just as good a name as any, don't you think? And who'd steal a name like that?

2a) You have a point. Still kind of dorky though.

NEXT QUESTION!

3) You don't have to yell. Alright, are you actually "Scott [Insert name here]"?

Let's see...I know that I am not the following Scotts:

Scott Adams: He's the creator of "Dilbert"

Scott Keith: He's the Netcop of rec.sports.pro-wrestling.moderated, keeper of the RSPW(M) FAQ and Wrestlemaniacs.com Thunder recapper as well as recapper of wrestling PPV's.

Scott McCloud: He's the creator of the comic book Zot! as well as the writer of that really cool book, Understanding Comics.

Scott Zolak: He's a bad back-up QB with the New England Patriots. I wouldn't want to be him even if I could.

Stuart Scott: He's a EPSN Sportscenter guy who I absolutely HATE!

Mike Scott: He WAS a pretty good pitcher for the Houston Astros way back in the eighties. But they lost to the NY Mets (yay!) in the 1986 play-offs so he and his team are officially losers in my book.

George C. Scott: He's the guy that played Patton and is an all-around crazy white guy.

Mary, Queen of Scots: Nope, not her either.

To my knowledge, I have never been any of these "Scotts"

3a) Not even Mary, Queen of Scots?

No, not even Bloody Mary.

4) What's with the "yay!" after the NY Mets?

Oh, that can be summed up by the fact that I love any and all New York teams in professional sports. This includes the Mets, the Knicks, the Giants, the Rangers, even the Jets and the Islanders and the Yankees, although you're not supposed to cheer for ALL of them because they're supposed to be cross-town rivals or something like that.

4a) Just New York teams? Isn't that kind of narrow minded?

I also cheer for the Broncos.

4b) Oh, so you're a bandwagoner!

No, I cheered for the Broncos way before they won BACK TO BACK SUPERBOWLS!

4c) Yeah, whatever.

Well, it's true.

5) What about college teams?

Naturally I cheer for the University of Hawaii teams, even if they do tend to choke (basketball, volleyball) or suck really bad (football). I also cheer for The Kentucky Wildcats and the Georgetown Hoyas in NCAA basketball. As for football I cheer for the Florida Gators and the Penn State Nittany Lions. But outside of UH, my absolute favorite school (in any sport) is Notre Dame. I think I've been cheering for the Fighting Irish (especially in football) longer than I've been cheering for UH.

5a) Wow, you tend to bandwagon a lot.

Screw you.

6) One last question for now.

Shoot.

6a) Why are you obsessed with Brent Barry?

What do you mean?

6b) I mean, why is there a Brent Barry shrine on your UH homepage?

Oh. Simply put, after Patrick Ewing, Brent Barry is my absolute favorite basketball player.

6c) You're kidding, right?

No. He's got talent!

6d) Uh-huh.

Seriously! He is the only white guy to have ever won the NBA Slam Dunk competition. And he even used Dr. J's dunk from the free throw line. Plus he hot-dogs like mad and doesn't play defense.

6e) Right. Didn't Michael Jordan do that free throw line thing?

But Dr. J did it first! And Brent did it BEST!

6f) I'd ask more but now I'm scared. That's all for now.

BARRY! BARRY! BARRY!