Life Question 4

Life Question 4
Turning Points: What crucial changes have brought me to this place in my life?

We acquire memories as we age; they become, as Aldous Huxley noted, our private literature. Someone has said that we were given memories so that we can have roses in December. But some of our memories bring frost in June. Delving into our memory bank to recall the most formative turning points of our life (as we will be doing in this unit) can be bittersweet; however, if we reminisce "creatively," we will likely find this a rewarding experience.

Creative Reminiscence

Reminiscence -- the recollection of the past -- appears to increase as we grow older. At one time, this activity by older persons was considered to be a regressive and even unhealthy preoccupation. More recently, reminiscence and "life review" have been held to be beneficial for many and even necessary for some. One reason that reminiscence has sometimes been poorly regarded is that it is possible to get stuck in the past, endlessly retelling it or reliving it, but never learning from it or using it to good purpose. Another reason is that a heightened preoccupation with the past can keep one from making more of the present and future.

Some research has shown that older persons who were aging successfully made more use of reminiscence that was "integrative" (accepting and coming to terms with the past) and "instrumental" (drawing on the past to deal with present); these successful agers made less use of reminiscence that was "obsessive" (rumination on disturbing past events).¹ Recollection that is integrative, instrumental, and not obsessive can be called "creative reminiscence" -- the recollection of the past in a way that creates a better present and future.

The Danish scholar Kierkegaard wrote, "We live life forward but understand it backward." In creative reminiscence, we give ourselves an opportunity to reflect on what has been and relate it to the full sweep of both past and present. This can lead to some new or deepened insights and offer guidance for the present and future.

Through creative reminiscence, we can clear the past. We can finish unfinished business and deal with denial, regret, grief, and unfulfilled dreams. But we can also use creative reminiscence to commemorate and celebrate the past, making the most of what was good.

We learn about a nation by tracing its history. We learn about ourselves by tracing our development. In creative reminiscence, we get a new sense of our identity. We also have an opportunity to maintain and affirm what we consider to be most positively and saliently us.

Sharing our recollections is an important part of creative reminiscence. As we share, we learn from observing ourselves -- what was difficult to share and why, what brought unexpected tears or joy, what brought shame or pride, what brought pain or relief. And we welcome the response of others as we share ourselves with them; their response can give us a new perspective on ourselves and our lives.

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