I don't know why I keep writing in this thing. What I should be doing is saving all these entries on my hard drive so that when UH locks my site, I can rebuild somewhere else, far away from the ashes of this disaster. I just wanted to say that to be all melodramatic, but I know now that I will never be returning to UH again. I hate this school and I'm sure it hates me as well.

With that in mind, I'll try to keep this short that that I can go around and try to save some of these entries. That's the problem though, with 6 years of journals. So much to do so little time.

Can I sum it all up? Probably not. Will that stop me from trying, probably not, well at least until I get tired of typing or my laundry finishes.

We were looking to move, out of this state, for quite some time. My grandma has been wanting me to move to MS, even going as far as to offer me free rent in one of her rental houses, which are smallish 3 bedroom houses. Not too bad, they're basic but nice and close to her. Well, two problems, first they are small! I mean, I have a huge place here and I swear my living room here is bigger than .75 of the house. Anyway, the other problem of course is that it is in MS. Now the thing with my grandma is that I feel an obligation to make her happy. They (grandparents) paid most of my tuition through this hideous beast of a university. If not for them, I would have had to take more "work breaks" and may not have ever made it to graduation day. They provided me with unwavering support through all the drama with my mom kicking me out, cutting me off, kicking me out, etc. So if my grandma wants me to move closer to her, well I'm going to try as much as I can to do that. Granted, I need to keep the best interests of my family in mind, which is why MS is out of the question. My husband has never lived on the mainland and even a mediocre cook should know, if you drop an egg into a pot of boiling water, it will crack.

So the search was on then, for an acceptable compromise. I decided on TN, close but not too close, south but not too south. Plus they have Costco. We found a house that we liked and that was in our price range. Only problem was that being here, basically a 24 hour trip away, I have no job in TN and I can't keep my job in HI and be there to take care of all the related house things. We decided to try for it anyway. I spoke with a loan guy and explained the situation to him, he said it sounds ok just as long as I was aware that eventually I would have to get a job in TN. Yes, of course, eventually meaning after everything was taken care of with the house, in other words, after closing. So being prequalified and preapproved, we went ahead and made an offer on the house, which was accepted, earnest money was sent, a contract was signed. Then when we actually went to complete the loan, they say, oh you don't qualify because you don't have a job. We tried a whole bunch of different ideas and companies to no avail. I requested an extension on the closing to find financing, they said yes, then they said no.

Well, we're not going to get the house, no big deal, it was a nice house in a nice place but it's not the only house. We'll just wait a while until I can find a job there and then we'll find another house we like even better. Now, throw into all of this that Wayne would not be coming with me, initially. He's trying one more time to get into HPD. We won't know for 2 months to a year if he does or does not get accepted. If he does get accepted, he'll go through academy and work here for two years before being able to transfer to a dept in Tennessee. With that in mind, and thinking that we would not get the house, I planned for a B. I noticed, with great excitement that my old employer Happy Airlines, were hiring in my old position again. I've been trying to get this job back since I left it back in 2001. Unfortunately the events of 9/11 caused a hiring freeze and all that junky stuff. I applied and was notified of a group interview to attend. I reserved a space for that and booked an airline ticket to SEA.

So here's how plan B was supposed to work. Plan B assumes I get the job at the airline. I stay with Lil' P and Mory until I get settled and find a place of my own to rent, in the meanwhile working lots of OT (plan B also assumes there is lots of OT to work), saving money to add to our existing money that was earmarked as the down payment. Eventually W would either get into HPD or not, if not, he'd come out to SEA as well and try for a dept there. In the meantime, we'd have flight benefits and be able to see each other more often than if I were working some generic job in TN. Now there was a Plan C, which assumed that I did not get the job and then I'd head down to TN and look for previously mentioned generic job. We added a plan D which was instead of driving to TN and renting a place there, I'd go to MS and stay in my grandma's garden house with all our animals, driving up to TN for good job interviews.

Well, turns out there was some kind of strange loan thing going on and we managed to get a no-income loan, which is based more on your credit than your actual income. Well, I have excellent credit and W has a small income and goodish credit (because he really has no credit, so it's like on the low end of good), so we got this loan. The interest rate is a little high but it's actually not far from what we were able to qualify for with my previously high income and the house really doesn't cost that much anyway and we were planning to pay it off faster than the 30 years the mortgage is for. Another reason why getting the job in plan B would be good.

So we got the house which means now that we have too many good things going at one time. I still wanted to take the job in SEA so I created a modified plan B, which I will call plan E to avoid confusion. Modified Plan E was, Sarah, my sister, was going to move out to my house and take care of it and the animals for 6 months or so.. Nonono, sorry, that was plan E-2. Plan E was that her and her husband and baby were going to move to Knoxville (they currently live in Memphis) and rent the house from me for half of the amount of the house payment, which is still pretty cheap and a way better deal than renting some shitty apartment in Memphis like they usually do. Well, I made this great offer to my sister and she tells me no because her husband is in two bands and does not want to leave Memphis also he's got a great job and just got a raise. Well, he's a fucking house painter and I sent her a lead on a house painter job in Knoxville. I pointed out that it was a nice big house in a nice place and much better than the slum living she's used to. No go. I pointed out that he could still drive back to Memphis on the weekends to practice with his bands and that jobs pay more in Knoxville anyway. Still no go. I tried being mean by pointing out that obviously they're not making it in Memphis so maybe they should try something new. Nope. What a fucking brat.

I tried to appeal to her human side and explained why I wanted to take the job in SEA, mostly because it provided me more opportunity to see W. At this point we were discussing plan E-2, which involved her and the baby going down there. Well, she has the nerve to tell me that that is too long to be away from her husband. I point out that he can drive out to see them, and she says that they've already figured that he would drive out there every other weekend. So then I was pissed because first of all, there are a whole lot of military people in Iraq, etc who would give anything to be able to see their spouses every other weekend, instead of not seeing them at all for a year and not even being able to speak to them on a regular basis. Nevermind that I had just explained to her that I was trying to work it out so that I could see W more than once a year. Well pooh on her. She says she can go for two months, maybe. Whatever, I could go for two months, maybe.

Anyway, so then I decide I’m just going to have to move out there to our house, with all the animals and work some shitty job until Wayne gets out there. I’ve already tried applying at all the airlines at the small TYS airport and even tried applying with the airlines at the MEM airport even though it’s 8 hours away. No luck. I could go to school since UT is 4 miles away but we won’t really have much money if I’m not really going to be working that much, since I’d be going to school. Well, then to consider, there is the issue that my brother was doing a lot of behind the scenes work to put in a good word at the company. I don’t like to shit on favors, it’s just not cool to go in and say, hey thanks for all your hard work but I don’t need it after all. I mean seriously, nothing pissed me off more at work than really feeling for a customer’s dilemma, going through all these loopholes, getting exceptions, talking to this person and that, finally letting them know you can help them, and then they say, "Nevermind." It’s like they don’t appreciate all your hard work and it’s like damn, if you didn’t want to do it, you should have stopped me 30 minutes ago before I went through all this effort. Then I have to go alert everyone who was helping me out on it that they changed their mind and then I’ve wasted everyone’s time. So I didn’t want to do that, although that was my mom’s suggestion. I didn’t want to burn all my bridges in SEA because I try not to burn bridges, as you never know when you might need to go across them again. My mom pointed out that I would probably not be moving back to Seattle, which while true (not my ideal place to settle), still doesn’t mean that maybe one day Happy wouldn’t start service into MEM or TYS or some other place that I would be.

Well anyway, I didn’t want to consider blowing if off as an option. So we came up with Plan F, which is what we are currently on. Plan F, again assumes that I get the job in SEA. We rent the house out in TN, to a family or to some students. Sarah can be the property manager since you need to have one if you’re out of state. She close enough in Memphis that she can be there within 24 hours if something happens. We won’t pay her, we’ll just cover her expenses while she’s there. Either I’ll get her a credit card with her name on it, which is probably not a good idea, unless it has a really low limit. I guess I can actually make a lot of the arrangements myself, online, although still there is the problem of her needing credit cards to check into hotels and such. Well, I’ll work on those details later. Anyway, she’ll probably go for that and that was her previous job anyway. She can handle all the interviews and crap like that and be the liason between me and the tenants. We were hoping to be able to get enough to at least cover the house payments, but I don’t know, so far what I’ve seen online is not helping much but some seem really low, some seem to fit that. I know we’re taking a risk by renting especially being out of state, but I’ll be able to swing by there sometimes.

So with us renting the house, we can continue with a sort of plan B, with me staying with Lil’ P and Mory until I actually start working and find a place to rent that will accept pets. The cats and hopefully dog will arrive and everything will be all G. With Wayne still making his income, me making more than him just by virtue of my hourly pay being higher, and the rent from the house, we should be more than fine, even having to pay rent at an apartment in SEA. Wayne actually makes enough on his income to cover the house payments. I’ll make enough in one paycheck to cover my rent and expenses, meaning we’ll still have money left over to make extra principal payments and crap like that. The rent coming in from the house can go towards repairs/upkeep, more principal, etc. Eventually either my mom or Wayne will move out to the house and then all the animals and furniture can go to them and if I want, I can move into a smaller cheaper place. Or I can just live there long enough so I won’t feel so bad when I lose the entire deposit because of my mom’s peeing cats and my poor separation anxiety afflicted pooping dog. As part of Plan F, if Wayne does not make it to HPD, he will immediately move to TN and we will continue with the visits ala flight benefits.

My mom is a little peeved because she wanted to ship all the animals and furniture to me at the house but I like this new plan F, Wayne likes plan F and hopefully everyone else will eventually be appeased. Again, plan F is based on me getting the job and with all this talking about it and planning, I probably will not get the job, which would be just my luck. Fortunatley though there’s a plan G, which is that if I don’t get the job I will simply drive my little car out to my little house in TN and find a job there.

So that’s the long and short of it. There’s actually a lot more details like all the crazy flying that is going to be going on in the next few weeks. See, Saturday night I’m leaving HI and flying to SEA, Monday is the interview, then I have a week to play around and hope my car arrives. Friday the 9th, I’m flying to HOU, getting a hotel, renting a car, visiting my friend on Saturday. Now Sunday I was supposed to possibly have another visit, then fly back to SEA that evening. However with all this stupid house stuff, Sunday afternoon I will be flying to TYS, renting a car, getting a hotel, because Monday is the closing on the house. Thursday I will be flying back to SEA and I was supposed to be picking up my mom and the dog and two cats and driving out to Knoxville to set up residence in the house but due to new plan F, unless I have to go with plan G, this will not happen. Instead I have a return ticket to HI on 5/15, which I will mostly be taking to settle things at home until I have to return to SEA to start training. I am going to be so sick of flying (as if) but at least I’ll get lots of frequent flyer points, well except on those fucking ATA legs. Now, that will suck.

I’ll try to keep everyone up to date on what’s going on and which plan we are currently in. It’s kind of like the whole terror level thing, it’s pretty fun. I really want to get my iBook so I can keep a little journal on the road but unfortunately all this poorly planned travel (thanks to those fuck ups in TN) is taking a toll on my previously paid off credit card. We’ll have to see what’s left after paying to ship my car, which I had hoped to do earlier this week. The problem though: Too much gas! For some strange reason, when I put gas in my car on Saturday, I decided to fill the tank up. Habit, that’s why. Anyway, you can’t ship with more than .25 tank and damn my car is too fuel efficient. Wayne’s been driving to work in Kailua everyday with the AC blasting but it’s still only on half tank. I guess that makes sense considering that even with driving 50 miles a day to and from Mililani for work, I only had to fill gas once a week, if even. I guess maybe we’ll have to take a drive around the island tomorrow? Wayne may end up taking it down for me on Monday instead, after I leave, what a pain in the ass. His name isn’t on the reg or title though so I’ll have to work that out with the shipping people. Arg. Better get that figured out so I can call them by tomorrow since I think they’re closed on the weekends.

Ok I think my laundry is more than done.

Oh got in touch with Matson, talked to this crazy guy. Anyway, made the payment, so that's taken care of. Arranged for myself or Wayne to drop the car off. I just need to get a notorized letter that says that I allow Wayne to ship the car since I am the sole owner on the title. Wayne wasn't with us the day we made the changes so I could add his name. Then again, I guess I could just ask easily go down and have his name added because that would help with the insurance maybe? No, nevermind because his insurance company basically refused to talk with us about that. I guess I'll have to call someone in SEA once I get there and find out if Plan F is indeed in effect.