oh wow, it's been so long, my most humble apologies. i hardly know where to begin. i guess i should find out when i left.

or maybe i should just start babbling and assume you've heard nothing. okie, that works.

well, first of all, let me wish you all a happy Easter because i probably won't be by on sunday to do so. second, i hope you all had a spiffy spring break and i trust that yours ended way too soon, like mine.

i went to canada, to vancouver, bc. it was cold and rainy but very clean. also the drinking age in canada is 19 but it's really hard to find liquor. i also went to tacoma, wa to see mikey. that was interesting. it was cold there but not nearly as cold as canada. me and dave got lost trying to find our way back from Sea-Tac to Fife, where our motel was located. when we finally made it back we had the fun of trying to open bottles of corona without a bottle opener. it can be done, if you have the proper equipment (tweezers, nail clippers, hangers, etc) do not, i repeat, do not forget a knife to cut the lime because keys just don't cut it, literally.

my sister is no longer pregnant. i'm not even sure if i said she was (again) just in case, here's a brief recap...

sister is pregnant, 2 months, baby is due in june. sister is not pregnant due to a miscarriage. sister is pregnant, supposedly 2 months again. however g-barb says she looks at least 5 months. sister loses baby due to car accident. plans for the wedding (to her 24th fiance) are still on, but because there's no longer a baby, will be postponed until the end of the year and they also want to move out here (to hawaii) in september or around there.

okie, so that's that. here's what i think happened. sister got pregnant but father didn't want baby so sister found another guy, first "miscarriage" occurs. sister is pregnant "again" immediately after meeting guy and guy decides to be honorable and marry her. he's obviously pretty dense because he can't tell the difference between 2 and 5 months. sister goes to doctor, tells him she's 2 months, doctor tells her she's awfully big for 2 months and decides to do ultrasound. he also offers possibilities for largeness, assuming she really is only 2 months. after ultrasound, doctor tells sister she's nuts and she really is about 5 months. this is where it gets tricky...there are 2 possiblities.

1) guy gets upset because baby can't possibly be his and demands sister aborts baby or else...OR 2) sister doesn't want to tell guy so sneaks an abortion in on her way home from hospital.

there's the "car accident"

of course she could be telling the truth. that would be quite unusual for sister though, so i'd guess it's something more like my version.

okie, what else? me and dave had a lovely dinner at spaghetti factory to celebrate our 1 year anniversary! we exchanged wonderful gifts including boxers and a ring from me and a teletubbie collection and furby for me. isn't that all very nice? i thought so.

i got attacked by some dogs while i was delivering a pizza. that was not very nice at all. i have since had to stop delivering because i am terrified of dogs. my mom suggests that it may have something to do with the fact that i was attacked by a dog when i was a baby and this recent attack has caused my "repressed memories" to resurface. this may very well be true. whatever the reason, i'm really quite upset because i'm losing A LOT, a lot, A LOT of money being a cook (my new position) and i feel pretty weak letting the dogs get the best of me. i can't even look at my own dogs now.

well, i'd really love to stay and chat a little longer but i need to pee. and shower. and eat.