1/14

if you've ever plunged a cold blade through your own heart, you'll understand the day i had.

i smell like a chinese restaurant.

the relatives are borrowing my brand-spanking-new car. actually i should say they're renting it because they are paying me (i swear, they insisted) but i've only been driving it a week! had to get reacquainted with chelsea today. not the worst thing ever, i suppose. the worst thing ever is crying like a baby in starbucks because the way someone feels about you is a kind of a song and still you are at a loss for words and still you are at a loss for a way to, well, stay there forever. can you imagine wanting to stay in starbucks forever? if you can imagine it, you can understand the day i had.

yesterday i got a call from someone (at district?) wanting to know if i was interested in interviewing for a FT SPED position (in a middle school). that's how they put it: interested in interviewing. so i said okay. because i was quite sure i didn't want a FT job this term but wouldn't mind being on the school's list. the interview went well (but then, i always think i'm a great talker) and i got invited back for another tomorrow. they said they had a couple of PT positions too, which i could probably handle.

class yesterday: ok. stumbled on a secondary cohort -- they are way more candid than us elem grumps. one guy announced during the icebreaker that his favorite pastime was drinking jaegermeister. one of the women told us she was going through menopause so could we quit fiddling with the air con? the instructor is quite elderly and i hope this translates into getting out by 8:30 most evenings.

well, relatives in town. happy and sad. they know something is amiss. hopefully i won't be asked to spell it out.