Dear Jody,

Looking at Scott Mandelker's web site, I read your story and was compelled to write.

Accepting that I may be an ET, particularly a Wanderer is not a real issue with me. I read FROM ELSEWHERE when it first came out and related to much of what was said. By that time, I had already become familiar and comfortable with the whole idea of being a star person from Brad Steiger's writings.

That I have a unique purpose here on Earth is also not an idea that is hard to accept. I have done a lot of personal work on myself and from that have even come to know what "my work" or I what I consider "my work", is--at least for now. (See Naked Before God and Gift of Sex)

The area of my life that I seem to be stuck at is an area that many ETs seem to have problems with, and that is earning a living. For a number of years now, I have been floundering around, scraping by, but the whole time getting deeper and deeper into a hole and running out of options. Recently, I have been given an opportunity, by my grown sons, to start all over, to get a real job and get back on my feet. While I had every intention of doing this, this has not happened even though the job market is better than it has ever been in my lifetime. To sum up the past few months I can say that I have had a number of job interviews and was even scheduled to start a couple jobs, but I couldn't go through with them. THEY FELT AWFUL.

I don't consider myself and have never considered myself a lazy person. When something needs to be done, I pitch in and do it even when others are sitting around doing nothing. I've always been that way. The problems with the traditional hourly jobs that I've been considering is that they it seems they would be taking me away from what I'm supposed to be doing. Not that I can't do menial work, but that it is not what I am suppose to be doing. It always feels like I'm suppose to be looking in some other direction, but I don't know what direction that is. This feeling comes across very strongly. I cannot ignore it.

It's hard to explain to people who have been helping me, how I feel and what I'm going through. They me simply shake their heads in disgust, and I can't blame them. But I know there is nothing wrong with me, and in fact, that there is a lot right with me, but this is a real problem.

What about those of us who are experiencing this? I know there are others. How do we, or I, get unstuck? How do I take the next step? Or, what is the next step? Are there support groups for us where we can talk to others experiencing this? How do we earn our way, when we really want to? We are different, that's why we don't fit. But we have gifts and insights and see things differently, and we have "jobs" to do.

How do I empower myself for the next step? I'm 56 and have been struggling with this ever since I found my "purpose" thirteen years ago--and there is obviously no going back. But I'm tired and getting scared that I may not be able to pull out of this, and those that have been helping me are tired and scared too.

Sincerely, Dan Ziegler ddziegler44@yahoo.com