Hi,
It seems very strange that I landed on your site, but I would really like your honest opinion as I have nobody else to cofide in. These are my experiences I have had throughout my life that draw many similarities to what I have read. My earliest memories of these dreams are very vague yet they have always been in the back of my head. From the age of 4 to around 7 I would have the same dream over and over, I would be lying down(or so it seemed) and I could feel the presence of maybe 4 or 5 people/beings around me. I remember communicating with them without fear but I cannot remember anything that was said. I do remember, without any doubt at all, that they would tickle me. I know it sounds strange, but that is what would transpire.
All through my childhood I had a love of Science Fiction (Dragonlance,D&D). I would read them non stop for hours on and feel myself becoming very emotionally attached to this world. In fifth grade I acquired (from browsing through the library), a very intense interest in UFOs and ETs. I would become very upset when they were referred to as hostile, such as in movies. I read tons of books on the subject, but never felt "satisfied" (for lack of a better term) once finishing them. I always felt like the people who reported their experiences were perceiving things the wrong way.
What got me most about your site is how a lot of my personality traits are very well described. I've always been a shy person, I have always trusted people entirely too much, and many times I do not understand the violent nature of people. In my younger years I was incredibly gullible and would believe almost everything I heard... I attributed that to stupidity. I have never had (or noticed) any telepathic abilities, only on occasion. Sometimes when I am sitting in the room with my mother, I would answer questions that she would ask, but she would insist that she was just "thinking" them. I am not like anyone in my family. They are of Italian descent and have very short tempers. I am nothing like that whatsoever. I get along very well with everyone of them and it has been years since they have argued with me yet they argue with each other constantly.
But here is the recent experience I have had which has really got me wondering. 2 weeks ago before an exam (I'm in college), I was incredibly frustrated and had nobody to turn to. I wondered if there really was a god and if I was all alone. At that moment, a feeling of which I have never come close to experiencing before filled my body, it was one of pure love, the purest love I have ever felt and it chokes me up now to even write about it. I also felt this presence in the room like it was sitting right next to me consoling me. From that point on, all of my frustration and stress simply disappeared and I felt better than I have ever felt in my life.
Peculiar things started happening, the next day in Accounting class, I could have sworn I saw an aura around my Accounting teacher. I was much more at ease with everything I did. Then somehow I ended up on your site and read all of the characteristics... that's when I began to remember recurring dreams I had throughout highschool. I would be looking out of my window and see a huge planet right in front of me (I think it was red). I would think it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen and long to be on it.
I've always had feelings of isolation and alienation and somtimes I think that I have not yet ended up where I'm supposed to be. This morning, when I got on to your site and began browsing around, I thought to myself "why am I even interested in this?". Immediately I got a thought that said, very clearly "FIND OUT ABOUT YOURSELF". This was not a thought that I created... I don't think. I am very confused. I have probably left out some other things that are seemingly less important, but I'm rushing to get all this stuff off my mind. Please respond..
Sincerely
Chris